Bullied

Went to take blood from a patient.  Mr J.S,   56 y/o gentleman present with status asthmaticus.  He is now stable. 

K: Hi,  I'm D,  a junior intern.  I came here to take your blood.  Sorry to disturb your dinner.
J: nahh,  you are fine. 

*busy preparing stuffs*

J: are you okay?
K: I'm grand! :D
.... And then I couldn't get the vein on the first try.  Sobsss but he was a very friendly man! Keep on saying -  you are okay,  take your time,  you will find it,  we need to learn,  don't say sorry (since I say that a lot lately) :(

And then I go and check on the other arm. 

And he suddenly said this, "your boss is a bully"  (boss=consultant)

Erk.  Hurm. 
I told him,  she is not.  She is just like that.  But he keeps on saying I know bullies.  They are a group of people who had been bullied while they are in training and then later,  they started bullied others.  It is a cycle.

I'm just do my job and listening him talking about bullied and smile.  That's the least I can do. 

I don't know if I'm really been bullied or if I am that weak.  I got patients saying are you a nurse.  Lols.  Nak jadi doktor dah ni,  tak ada muka doktor ke aku ni.  Lols. 

To be honest.  I'm gonna finish med school in less than 6 weeks.  Amin insyAllah! And to be fair, they are expecting you to be on your feet in July. (since intern starts working in July here) So,  it means you need to act fast in diagnose, plan, management.  Not just taking bloods (which I am very good at.  Lols)

So,  for the sake of patients,  I need to be competent and able to make quick decisions. 

Competency. 

I have no problem with patients.  I looooveeee talking with patients! I loooveee taking history and examination on them (given that they are not cranky.  Lols) but I have problem with consultant, sho,  intern etc.  I have problem answering their questions. I have problem present to them. And I don't know why. 

Got bad luck lately (bukan.  Allah nak ajar tuh, dear. It is a good luck actually.  Dapat jumpa urostomy bag! Hehe. ) Taking complicated patients and consultant pun naik pening.  What to do. It's happens. -_-'

Kena bully ke tak.  It is part of learning.  Dekat sekolah dulu pun asyik kena bully.  Well not really,  it is just helping.  Don't you think so?

Help vs bully.

I don't know.

Betulkan niat. Lillahita'a.  InsyAllah dapat pahala. 

Time kerja? One at a time.  When time comes,  time comes. 

P/s Corrib River.  A walk to remember.  #koyak

Patho Lab
14 Jamadilakhir 1437H
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