Monday, June 29, 2015

A true lady



Source: Google Plus


- feeling grateful and hopeful :)



p/s you have no idea the power of kindness until you do it. Expect the unexpected. If you have a right intention, insyAllah Allah will bring you through it. Just do it. Allah is with you :)




Lot 270
1124
12 Ramadhan 1436H

Saturday, June 27, 2015

D2

"Apabila Allah menyenangi hamba maka dia diuji agar Allah mendengar permohonannya (kerendahan diri)"

HR.  Al-Baihaqi


Lot 2740
1038
10 Ramadhan 1436H

Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Mummy ke Mami

Di kala awal pagi. Sahur.

Lambat! Makan la daku nasi, ikan, roti, tauchu, segala yang ada atas meja dengan beriya tanpa pandang kiri kanan. Lols

Papa melihat ku sambil sengih. Terberhenti sekejap dari makan.
Angkat muka, pandang Papa.

Tiba-tiba Papa kata, "Nurun sapo la?" (your looks, inherit dari siapa agaknya?)

Tersedak hanggg. Random betul Papa aku ni pagi-pagi.

Papa tanya, Papa jawab. "not me"
Dan Mami pun menyampuk, "not me either"

Eh eh. Sempat pulak bincang aku ni inherit siapa. Anak angkat ke aku ni? Ehehs.
Dah nak azan dah Papa Mami!

Aku sengih-sengih jawab. "Tok Ma kot. Nama dah sama." ehehs (Tok Ma = My grandmother on father's side)

Mami kata, "hurm. Tok We Joh kot. "

Ambik hanggg moyang terus. Oh dan nama kami pun sama. The three generations with the same name. Cool huh cool. Hoho.

Random di pagi hari. Akhirnya, tiada jawapan dari soalan itu. Saja suka-suka seorang ayah nak usik anak dia yang sedang makan dengan beriya nya. :D
 
By the way, I loves the way Papa looks at me. Penuh dengan kasih sayang. Gitu. Anak Papa la kot aku ni. 

Well, to be honest. Mami is my best friend and Papa is my guardian.


Oh some people spell Mami as Mummy. But we are taught to spell Mami as Ma-mi by our own mum. She taught us how to read so thats how she spell Mami in malay. Kalau tak, bagaimana nak eja Mami dalam bahasa Melayu kalau bukan Ma-mi?

Bahasa jiwa bangsa ok. Ehehs.


"Tidak ada hadiah yang lebih baik untuk seorang anak kepada ayahnya daripada adab yang baik" 
(Hadis direkodkan oleh Imam At-Tirmidzi)

Catatan Dhuha
Perkataan ikhlas senang disebut dan ditulis, tetapi betapa sukarnya untuk diterapkan dalam amalan. Ibadah puasa merupakan mekanisme untuk mentarbiah kita supaya ikhlas dalam amal kerana tidak ada siapa pun yang boleh mengetahui samaada kita berpuasa atau tidak.

Ust Idris Hj Ahmad
7 Ramadhan 1436. 24 Jun 2015 Rabu.


Cukup solehahkah aku untukmu, Papa?
Hurm.


p/s post tentang Mami dah ada dulu. Sekian.dan Happy belated Father's day. Eh, bukan hari-hari ke? Oho.


Lot 2740
1840
7 Ramadhan 1436H



I was wearing heels. So thats mean I am shorter then him. Sekian. 

Monday, June 22, 2015

Does he have autism?

Assalamualaikum and hi!

So, I (J) have this conversation with mum (M)

M: I overheard your sister talking with your sis in law about autism

J: hurm, ok.

M: She thought her son (S) has autism!

J: Why is that so? S looks normal though. He interact well with people, has good eye contact *being detective here. Ehehs*

M: Because S loves wheel!

J: ouh ok.


*S is 14 months-old boy

Then I checked my notes.

Well, my sister is partially true. Or quarterly true to be precise. Indeed one of the characters of having autism is  restricted behavior such as intense attachment to unusual object in which some psychiatrist give examples - stone or wheel. BUT in this case S doesn't has INTENSE attachment. He did loves wheels, but not that intense, sis. *typical first child problem. lols*

So let me tell you, about this autism thing which kinda fear in our community. 

In psychiatric, we say autism as ASD = Autism Spectrum Disorder. Why spectrum? because there are varies level of autism. According to ICD 10 *gitew*, ASD is classified as Childhood autism (the most common), atypical autism, Retts syndrome, Childhood Disintegrative Disorder, Asperger's Syndrome and Pervasive Developmental Disorder Unspecified. 

*hang ingat, autism ni simple ke, huh? lols*

Each child with Autism has different symptoms. But the core symptoms are poor/absent social interaction, language and communication disorder and restrictive/repetitive behavior. *camne tuh, kak? sabar nohh, sat lagi hakak explain ye dik. Ehehs* Some child might have one symptoms but not the other. For example, in Asperger's Syndrome (one of autism spectrum), the child doesn't have problem in language but, he is clumsiness and have restricted gesture. The non verbal IQ is lower then the verbal IQ. Some people say this as mild autism.

Ok, back to the symptoms. 

What does it means as poor/absent social interaction? You must be freaking out when your child didn't follow your instruction eh or answer your question and you suddenly screaming, "MY CHILD HAS AUTISM!" lols. Drama. In your case, he could have elective mutism (relative or absolute failure to speak in social/specific situations. No worries. It can be cure. Hehe)

Back to the symptom: Poor/absent social interaction
Example - poor eye contact, no peer relationship (not sharing interest/activities/emotions), lack of social or emotional reciprocity, not interpreting body language/facial expressions/social cues, lack of spontaneous seeking to share enjoyment. 

In my own word, numbness, living in my own world, "i can survive, baby" type. Ehehs.

Next, language and communication disorder.
Example: has delay in speech development, no useful speech, reliance on stock phases, lack of social use of language, pronominal reversal (when the kid refer themselves as "he", "she" instead of "I") , echolalia (repetition of speech), lack of imagination/fantasy thoughts/ social imaginative play

As for my dictionary, it is like a robot waiting for instruction. *paham ke? lols* 

Last one, restricted/repetitive behavior
Example: unusual preoccupation and interest, rigid routine, rigid pattern of play, intense attachment to unusual object such as stone or wheel, stereotype and repetitive motor manner such as hand flapping, nodding, rocking, 

My own definition = too young to be tooo perfectionist. Ehehs.


Thats the core symptoms. If you see your child has some of this symptoms, waittttttt, DON'T JUMP YET! not yet. What you should do is observe in a different setting. Maybe he is too smart, reading this symptoms in my blog and acting like one to get your attention. Lols. Too smart to be true. Hehe. To diagnose autism, you need to observe in more than one setting, and of course there are number of tests! i.e ADI-R, DISCO, CARS, ADOS. Ahah, you are trap, kid! It is not that easy to say someone has autism just like that you know. 

but but but if it is true, and you are freaking out. What you should do is seek for help, a doctor. Human doctor. Not Dr Google MD. ok! It is a blessing. Because he/she is special. Your ticket to Jannah, man. I know it is not easy but lots of ways can be done to reduce the burden. *easy say as I am not the one who has the burden* 

Well, in my textbook. *ehehs*. There are family psycho education, practical support, education, therapy (SALT, OT, physical, CBT, Vocational). And we can give medication such as Risperidone, SSRI or treat the anxiety. I am not going to give whole lot of lectures you know. But just to let you know, there are help out there. It is not to cure autism but it can promote normal development, reduce the rigidity and stereotype behavior, remove the maladaptive behavior and alleviate family stress. Quite hopeful, aite. 

Lastly, if you ask me why this happen or how we can prevent it?

I am sorry, mam, no exact answer. Some, say because of seizures, increase serotonin etc. but definitely NOT BECAUSE OF VACCINE! I am 100% sure of that. So puh-leass *a.k.a please* don't make up stories and get your fact right! Ask from a right person.

There are risk factor of autism that I can list here - Genetic, perinatal complications, neuro abnormalities, medical condition such as seizures, and executive function deficit especially frontal lobe. So, you prevent some of the risk such as do regular check up during your pregnancy, reduce risk of seizures. 

 Anyway, one of my nephews was suspected having autism. He has a very poor eye contact, rarely talk to us, delay in speech, more problem related to social interaction and he has this habit of hand flapping. My sister in law was freaking out and he was sent to see specialist, did CT scan etc and it turned out he has a bit problem in his brain (relate with speech and language pathway). He went to speech and language therapy for sometime but now Alhamdulillah a healthy, talkative, adorable, soleh 11 years-old-boy *siap hafal quran habaq hang, hang boleh? ehehs*


So, yeah. It is scary at first. As a mother, you want the best for your child. But just bear in mind, your children are not yours. He/She is Allah's. We are giving amanah to take care of them. 


42:49

To Allah belongs the dominion of the heavens and the earth; He creates what he wills. He gives to whom He wills female [children], and He gives to whom He wills males.

42:50

Or He makes them [both] males and females, and He renders whom He wills barren. Indeed, He is Knowing and Competent.


42;49-50

For whatever difficulties that you have to face, you are not alone.Allah is always with us. Remember, this world has its end and then, the real life begins. Hang it there, mate.

May Allah bless us!
Take care!


p/s I am started to write about psychiatric more often lately. Hurm, Another fun way of learning I guess. I am tired of writing notes, notes and notes, and answer past year questions. Lets try something new. Ehehs. *hope it works.and get your intention right, dear. huhu*


Lot 2740
1913
5 Ramadhan 1435H


 
Does he looks normal. Yes, he is! but he has Asperger's Syndrome. *a type of autism spectrum disorder* Autism is worldwide. Not just in your family. Hope you are OK, Ryan

Sunday, June 21, 2015

Sesungguhnya aku berpuasa

Bagai pungguk rindukan bulan.

Sesungguhnya aku berpuasa. 

Aku berpuasa. 

*distraction*

T. T

Wahai email,  bila mahu sampai?

Jawab email,  aku berpuasa.  Sabar noh. 

-_-"

The Power of Habit

Assalamualaikum and hi!


Hows your ramadhan so far?? Hopes everything ok. I am still struggling here. Get adjusted with new timetable, new time zone (well, one month dah balik ok. Hoho), new room, new yadaa yadaa.

Enough with the excuses, dear.

Habit.
I have this habit and I have just figure it out that I have it! Erk. Or memang buat-buat tak tahu. Hahaha.

Habit of sleeping with books! Any kind of books. Be it medical books or storybooks or etc. I have just realized that I always have books next to me. It is not that I read before I go to sleep or after I wake up.

Ramadhan books! or this summer books (plus medical books yang bertimbun -_-')

Oh, and the books are next to me ON THE BED. Isn't that strange?                              

Ouh if you say I don't have enough bookshelves, na ah you are wrong. I have 5 bookshelves next to my bed and which 1 of it is half empty. So, there should be no excuse for me not to put it back on the shelves. But I don't know why I keep on put it on the bed. 

seeeeee, it is half full or quarter full, maybe. Ehehs 

My mum first realized it when I choose to sleep peacefully *merengkok* then remove the books. Hurm, I don't find it a problem though. *senang nak share katil ni. Hehe. Except rebut selimut. Ops. Ouh books tak rebut selimut ok*

Thats my habit since few years ago I think.

So, my not-so-little-brother share with me about the power of habit. He read this book entitled The Power of Habit. Yeah, you read it right. And it is kinda interesting. *thinking of borrow from him but he left it in UK. Urgh. Fine*

So, here is his review. Credit to him :)


[ The Power of Habit ]
Umur 30-an bukan umur 20. Your 20's will determine how is your life in the 30's. And your life in the 30's will define your life in the 40's and till you die.
Charles Duhigg mengkaji faktor-faktor pembentukan habit/kebiasaan dan juga cara-cara untuk mengubah atau membentuk kebiasaan yang baru menggunakan the golden rule of habit. Cue -> Routine -> Rewards.

Sesetengah perkara yang kita lakukan sebenarnya hasil dari subconscious mind kita aka automatik tanpa perlu berfikir panjang. Ingat Zaman mula-mula nak belajar memandu? Banyak sangat routine yang perlu dibuat sebelum, semasa dan selepas memandu. Tapi apabila kita dah belajar semua itu, reward dia, kita boleh travel dari satu tempat ke tempat lain. Dan kita dah tak perlu fikir dah rutin2 tu. Menjadi otomatik.
Tu contoh yang simple.

Material/teknologi Zaman sekarang banyak menggunakan psikologi habit, dan pengaruh hormon supaya pengguna keep on using produk mereka, sehingga menjadi satu habit.
Well, orang kata habit dan kebiasaan kamu itu ialah kehidupan kamu.
Charles Duhigg menyentuh bukan sahaja dari aspek individu, malah juga kebiasaan dalam organisasi, penyelesaian alcoholism dan addiction.
--
Dari satu segi, boleh kaitkan dengan beberapa perkara dalam Islam sendiri.
1. Semua benda bergantung kepada niat. Dan niat akan bergantung kepada iman seseorang. Iman dan niat yang baik, insyaAllah kebiasaan dan habit akan jadi baik dan positif. Namun, tidak semudah A,B,C untuk laksanakan.
2. Nabi kata, Allah suka benda yang sedikit tapi istiqamah. Dari satu segi, boleh faham bila benda baik yang sedikit itu sudah dilakukan selalu, itu menjadi sebahagian rutin kehidupan individu itu tersebut.
Thumbs up.like emoticon like emoticon


Isn't it interesting? Go and find the book now!! Ehehs. 

Here is the book!
Well, so my habit of putting books next to me so that I read more and more books, *subconsciously* but it turns out I am only half way finish most of the books. sigh. The habit just makes me feel easy. Not good, dear not good. So, this Ramadhan, lets strive to finish it all! Bring it on!

Conclusion: as long as the habit brings you closer to Him, The Almighty, bring it on! But if it brings you away from Him, think again. We can change. Istiqamah itu mudah :)


Lot 2740
0820
4 Ramadhan 1436H

P/s lets do it!! 


Wednesday, June 17, 2015

[SONG] Ramadhan Tiba





Ramadhan Tiba - Opick 


Ramadhan tiba 3X
Marhaban Ya Ramadhan 4X


Ramadhan tiba 3X
Marhaban Ya Ramadhan 4X


Ramadhan tiba semua bahagia
Tua dan muda bersuka cita
Bulan ampunan bulan yang berkah
Bulan terbebas api neraka


Andaikan saja Ramadhan semua
Bulan yang tiba bulan yang ada
Karena besarnya setiap pahala
yang di janjikan kepada kita


Marhaban Ya Ramadhan 4X


Dalam bersahur ada pahala
Dalam berbuka alangkah indah
Menahan diri menahan lidah
Menjaga hati menjaga mata


Banyakkan amal hari-harinya pahala
Datang berlipat ganda
Berlomba-lomba untuk ibadah
Dunia bahagia surga nanti gantinya


Ramadhan tiba 3X
Ramadhan tiba 3X


Dan semoga setiap jiwa
Diberikan ampunan-Nya
Dan semoga hapus semua
Kesalahan setiap jiwa


Marhaban Ya Ramadhan 4X
Marhaban Ya Ramadhan 4X
Marhaban Ya Ramadhan 4X
Marhaban Ya Ramadhan 4X




Meh rasa festive skit. ehehs.

Ramadhan mubarak, peeps!

For this coming holy month, I would like to apologize for any wrongdoings, any heartache, etc. I am sorry. And I'm forgive you. Lets forgive each other, aite. :) Allah is The Most Forgiving - Al-Ghafur, Al-Ghaffar, Al-Ghafir, then why not I forgive you and myself?

May Allah accepts our deeds - dulu dan selamanya! amin!

 ..... lets the battle begin! *especially for non-morning people like me. ehehs*

Talking about morning people. My vows since winter holidays, I will stay awake after subuh! ohoo but since coming back to Malaysia.....sobs sobs. Oh well, sleepyhead. For coming Ramadhan, I would not give in. Yosh! Berusaha! *I know I know I keep on saying this for ages. huhu.*

Never give up, shall we ;)

So, here is my resolution.

1 - self-control
2- self -conscious a.k.a more God-conscious.

Yosh!

ÙŠَا Ø£َÙŠُّÙ‡َا الَّØ°ِينَ آمَÙ†ُوا Ùƒُتِبَ عَÙ„َÙŠْÙƒُÙ…ُ الصِّÙŠَامُ ÙƒَÙ…َا Ùƒُتِبَ عَÙ„َÙ‰ الَّØ°ِينَ Ù…ِÙ†ْ Ù‚َبْÙ„ِÙƒُÙ…ْ Ù„َعَÙ„َّÙƒُÙ…ْ تَتَّÙ‚ُونَ
“Hai orang-orang yang beriman, diwajibkan atas kamu berpuasa sebagaimana diwajibkan atas orang-orang sebelum kamu agar kamu bertakwa.” (al-Baqarah: 183)

Bukanlah puasa itu (hanya) menahan diri dari makan dan minum. Sebaliknya ia juga harus tertahan dari perkara lagha dan lucah. Apabila kamu dimaki atau diperbodohkan, berkatalah AKU BERPUASA (riwayat Ibn Khuzaimah dan al-Hakim / Sahih al-Targhib 1068)

Tuesday, June 16, 2015

Pyromania or conduct disorder?

Salam and hi!

I am currently studying on child psychiatric. Kinda interesting. Why? because we often see that character in child (oh well, I have 20 nieces and nephews. so, you can imagine that I can relate it)

The thing about child psychiatric is it is only diagnose when the kids have number of criteria or excessively or inappropriately. But having said that, it is so difficult to diagnose a child with hyperactive or autism or conduct disorder if it is just culturally accepted. You know what I mean right. You can't simply said a child is ADHD according to DMS or ICD yadaa yadaa and it turns out, "ouh, thats normal", "not worrying at all" (according to the mother) As our culture (malaysia's culture) psychiatric is a taboo = a big NO NO = craziness = mental problem. Hence, the mother choose to say, "ala, budak-budak biasa laa" Not going to refer to any child psychiatric which might be reasonable if there is no problem. But can you imagine if the child left untreated = DUP (Duration of Untreated Psychosis) = prodromal state.

Long Duration of Untreated Psychosis (DUP) leads to poorer outcomes (Larsen et al 1996, Scully et al 1997)
This long DUP is very serious. It may lead to academic failure, might develop schizophrenia, behavior problem etc.

I might be over generalized here. I don't have any data or research paper etc on that argument for Malaysians. It is totally base on my observation and conversation with Malaysians mothers. Anyway, while studying on conduct disorder, it reminds me on this event. Childhood memory.

Before that, in case you don't know,
“Conduct disorder is a repetitive and persistent pattern of behaviour in which the basic rights of others or major age-appropriate societal norms or rules are violated
To diagnose a kid with this disorder, he or she must have at least 3 of the following symptoms for 12 months -

  • Aggression to people or animals e.g. bullying /uses weapon /threatens others/ Fights /Stealing / forced sexual activity
  • Destruction to property e.g. fire setting or non fire setting
  • Deceitful or theft
  • Serious violation of rules - stays out at night/ runs away /truant

ok thats sound sooo wordy.I am not going to give you lecture on this. ehehs.

Straight to the story.

Back in 1999, *giteww* I have this classmate. Well, he looked normal, acting normal, looks cute *ok main-main,* But one evening, our school guard found him trying to set FIRE on our CLASS! Not trying, but he was actually doing it. On the next day, we went to school, we could see burn trace *is it even a word?*. Geee. and according to gossipers, he want to burn the class because he hate our class teacher. Why? I don't know. Thank God, the school guard found him, if not, the whole class will be burnt! I have no idea how the school handle that. What I know, he was transferred to other school. *was not sure if he was kicked out from our school, or he was actually transferred*

So, he has one known criteria of conduct disorder.Destruction of property. Only God knows, if he has other criteria. - . But I know he was not aggressive to people. He was nice. 

and he was only 9 years-old. 


Another conduct-disorder-related-story, when I was a prefect in primary school, I did caught a junior (aged 7-8 years-old) stealing things from our co-op. She was caught red handed. I remember following her and talked to her about stealing bla bla but I can't remember what I did next. -_-' too old to remember. But the point is, it is very serious. 

If these two people really have conduct disorder and left undiagnosed/untreated, they may develop antisocial personality disorder when they grew up. And you know how dangerous this personality disorder is, very dangerous. They can forms but cannot maintain relationship, they are irresponsible, guiltless, heartless, easily lost temper, and blame other people for their own fault. They are people who are usually targeted by police because they always involve in violence.

So, if you say someone is bad, it could be due to their history- untreated/undiagnosed conduct disorder. Who's fault? the parent/ the prefect like me/ the society who fails to recognize the symptoms and refer to psychiatric. 


And why the kids acting like that? there are numerous reasons - biological causes or physiological causes. - low IQ, family history of antisocial behaviour, lack of warm parental relationship, large family size (i'm disagree on this. I have 10 siblings and I am good. hahhaha), domestic chaos, parental criminality, exposure to abuse and societal violence, school failure.

It is not the end for this child. There are lots of ways to deal with them. They are might be sooo difficult to deal but take time to listen and pray. Because Allah is the one who hold our hearts. 

Conclusion - pilihlah suami/isteri yang menjaga agama dan keturuan yang baik. Ehehs, Just joking.

Be careful when we are dealing with kids like this. 
Love them.
Talk to them.
Refer to a right person.
Rumahku syurgaku.
Safety first. 


Lot 2740
1823
29 Sya'ban 1436H



Aggressive to animals? Gee, how could you if the cat as cute as this. *gerammm*  Lols >.<

Saturday, June 13, 2015

Tua

Sedang berperang di medan ilmu. Aku berhenti seketika.
Mencari buku tentang kehidupan.
Lalu tangan mengapai buku Menalar Makna Diri, tulisan Ustaz Hasrizal Abdul Jamil.

Di muka pertama. Mata terpaku di bait kata-kata.

"Barang siapa yang menempuh usia mudanya dengan suatu kebiasaan, maka hingga ke usia tualah dia akan terua dengan kebiasaan itu" -pepatah arab.

Jiwa bergetar.
Esok umur sudah suku abad.
Apa yang ingin dicapai dari hidup ini, wahai diri?

Satu lagi bait kata menjengah

"Dan ia pun masuk ke kebunnya sedang ia berlaku zalim kepada dirinya sendiri, sambil berkata: Aku tidak fikir, kebun ini akan binasa selama-lamanya"- Al Kafh: ayat 35

Terasa bagai pertama kali baca ayat ini. Sedangkan saban Jumaat asyik diingatkan tentang surah yang agung.

Aahhh manusia. Pelupa.  Masakan tuhan turunkan Quran bukan kerana manusia itu senang lupa. An nasi'a.

Asyik fikir - habis belajar, grad, kahwin, kerja, dapat anak yadaa yadaa

Sama aja dengan manusia bukan Islam.
Kitaran hidup yang sama. Tiada arah tuju.

Kenapa kamu diciptakan, wahai diri?
Dan apa yang kamu ingin capai dalam hidup ini?

Tutup mata.
Tanya iman.

Lot 2740
1833
26 Syaaban 1436H

P/s at Cesky Krumlov with le girls

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Picky

Uthman bin Abu Al As At-Thaqafi berkata kepada anaknya,
"Wahai anak-anakku! Orang yang bernikah itu ibarat petani. Hendaklah kamu melihat di mana dia menanam tanamannya, keluarga yang tidak baik (asal usulnya) jarang sekali melahirkan anak yang baik. Maka berhati-hatilah memilih walaupun ia memakan masa"

Kata Saidina Umar Al Khattab tentang hak seorang ayah kepada anaknya
"Hendaklah dia pandai memilih ibunya, memilih nama yang baik untuknya, dan mengajarnya Al Quran'

-buku Tarbiyatul Aulad Fil Islam

I am not being picky but i am trying to follow the sunnah. Nak bimbing anak ingat senang ke oi. Ok. Check iman. 

Hurm. I should focus on something else first. Haish.

Lot 2740
2048
22 Syaaban 1436H


P/s at Bukit Keluang

Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Mimpi

Malam itu sejuk.
Sejuk dari biasa.
Telinga pula membingit sakit.
Gara-gara usia makin lanjut usia.

Setelah selesai berkemas di ruang tamu, mata dipinta untuk berehat.
Masih banyak lagi yang belum selesai.
Bilik yang satu itu jua masih belum disentuh.
Tapi apakan daya, jiwa meronta mohon berhenti seketika.

Lalu kepala diletakkan dibantal yang usang itu.
Cepat sungguh mata ini lelap.
Penat.

Mimpi.
Bukan selalu bermimpi.
Mimpi yang aneh.

Muka dia.
Muka guru.
Buku.
Kelas.
Diminta aku untuk belajar.
Siap ada tarikh overnight untuk belajar.

Aahhh  mainan syaitan.

Usai solat, hati terdetik.
Adakah ia nasihat dari Dia Yang Esa.
Usaha.
Engkau masih punya masa.

Dimanakah Dia di hati ini?
Mencari cinta manusia dikala usia lanjut.
Bagaikan lupa cinta tuhan itu tak pernah lekang dek tahun.

Ahhh manusia.
Cukup cukuplah wahai diri.
Usah ditatap warkah lama.
Tiada makna.
Tiada erti.
Mulakan hidup baru.
Mencari cinta Yang Satu.
Sayangi Dia sebelum kamu sayangi dia.

P/s sudah kesekian kalinya orang bertanya, 'bila turn kamu pula kahwin?' 'When is your turn?' *bila mana abang sendiri sudah selesai*

Dan kesekian kalinya juga aku menjawab, 'doakan' atau 'kejam' sedikit, 'bila kita akan mati? Begitulah turn aku boleh jadi cepat atau lambat' ehehs or 'hari sabtu tahun bila tak tahu' ehehs. Hohoho. 


Diri ini kembali berjuang.

Kata kakak, siapa diuji sekarang, senang kemudian hari.

Allah sedang persiapkan dirimu wahai diri.

Usah ditanya berapa liter air mata ini tumpah untuk 2 minggu ini.

Sakit.

Hanya tuhan yang tahu.


0747

16 Syaaban 1436H
Lot 2740


P/s at Adrspach, Czech Republic

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